This is what happens when I try. When I truly try to make things better with the deepest sincerities my heart has to offer. I put my best foot forward and jump head on into life. And it shoots me down. Always.
I told Ashley I was sorry for hurting her. (again) And that I am sorry she ever thought I cheated on her. ( I would never do that ) And that I understand why she would be so upset. And she basically told me she doesn't care if I go die. She's new and improved and her life is awesome. Except. She is failing, sick, and doing stupid shit again.
But. I love her. And I would never want her to think anything bad about me. So I take it.
Why did I say thank you god? Well. I thought he was supposed to help you when you did the right thing. When you tried. Apparently he makes life hard and it's a trial? No. He either doesn't exist or he hates us.
I might hang out with Jared tomorrow. Hopefully. =/
Ashley. Why?
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